A silicone suit that turns a man into an (anatomically-correct) woman. Again, ew. (via Tara) OH HOLY SHIT. This is real. You all need to calm down. This shit is real. Most of you have always wanted to know what it’s like to have a vagina right? And what it’s like to piss through a vagina? WHAT AM I TALKING ABOUT. God no. GOD. NO.
How many of you have had to shell out for a morning after pill because some asshole slipped it in sans condom? A friend of mine had to cough up $50 recently. That’s pretty expensive just so some shithead can feel your insides a little more right? Curious fggt wonders - How could you not know if he’s rubbered up or not? Does this happen a lot?
Give me all the dicks.
I need to know: Was it for a 4 pack or 10 pack… because I may have done worse.
I wanna get my fucky on. You are taking up valuable dick space. GTFO
“Now where did I put my massive cock. OH THERE IT IS”
I’m never going to see ‘Duplicity’. You know that, I know that. All you need is ‘Closer’. Over and over again. You know when people ask that SHITTY SHITTY question ‘who’s the HOTTEST movie actor for you?’. Always Clive Owen. Always. Fuck Brad Pitt. Does Brad Pitt have a chin you could smash fine China against? Does Brad Pitt have a voice that makes your cunt quiver? Does Brad Pitt look at you like he’s about to FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF YOU TILL YOU BLEEEEEED? No. He’s busy looking like an asshole with his eighty kids and transgendered wife. Fuck man. 0211013441, Clive, call me. Where’s my wine?
Only 4. But ya know, Islam kinda screwed me over on that one.
If you googled my name and found this blog, then, yes it’s me Marshall from last night. I just wanted to say that I had a really great time with you. It’s a pity you weren’t around on Friday night, it woulda been great to have spent more time together. You’re pretty great. And hot. And totally a good kisser. Anyway, thanks for making my valentines day. We should probably talk, because we’re going to need to explain to the hotel staff why we had sex in-between two vending machines in the hall.
No gays. None. Just the one that looked retarded back in Aqaba. I really don’t MAN-CHEST know what to do, like, I need to be touched, people - all I can think about are flashes of dirty, dirty, nasty things. We’re going to PENIS go out tonight, but we’re in Cairo, and i’m ASS-FUCK getting the same vibe as I was in the rest of the middle east, ie, no gay. Like, at first they HARD BONING look at you like they’re going to fuck you, but then ERECTION it turns into ‘give me your woman white man’. I don’t CUM BISCUITS know how much more of this I can take. Like, it’s lonely? I feel alone? No one else is on SEX-CRIMES the same wave-length? I’m probably being ridiculous, so I’ll BUTT-RAPE just get fucking drunk tonight and imagine the German tourists naked. Miss u gheys. HOLE SPLITTING
